by David Scott
Keep rollin’, rollin’, rollin’
Though the streams are swollen
Keep them dawwgies swim-meets rollin’Rawhide East-Side!
Many swimmers with abundant life experience undoubtedly recognize the lyrics from the black ‘n white Western TV series Rawhide, and the reference to “swollen streams” surely describes the weather conditions during the water-logged morning commute of November 6th. Travelers to the Snohomish venue had to endure sheets of rain along with standing water on road surfaces. I witnessed the results of at least two accidents during my 90-minute drive.
How about a big shout-out to the Snohomish Aquatic Masters (SAM) club for continually hosting meets at the impressive competition-grade Snohomish Aquatic Center, a “52,000-square-foot, state-of-the-art facility owned and operated by the Snohomish School District.”
SAM was one of the first groups in the area to go to the trouble of hosting meets during the era of COVID protocols with their aptly named “Give it a Shot” event. Belated thanks are in order for braving the uncertain COVID terrain and allowing eager swimmers to resume competition. I remember fondly that most folks, including myself, were uniformly slower when getting back in the swimming saddle, so to speak.
This particular meet, the Snohomish Aquatic Masters Invitational, was hosted during what local meteorologists refer to as the “Pacific Northwest Monsoon Season” or, to paraphrase the parlance of travel-marketing spin-meisters, “when some precipitation reaches the surface.”
The meet had 145 rain-soaked swimmers registered and rarin’ to go, making it one of the best-attended local competitions apart from the Champs and Zones meets.
The announcers mentioned a shortage of volunteer workers, but the concern resolved itself when the meet hosts engaged in heroic feats of multi-tasking. A humble suggestion when swimming at USMS events – take some opportunities to thank the volunteers for their time and effort. Your goodwill might be rewarded with a smile and result in a volunteer who feels appreciated.
The TWIM Roster was comprised of 11 swimmers: Alsberg, Barnes, Elliott, Haynie, Lickwala, Ness, Pelham, Scott, Shelly, Wahlstrom, and Walker.
There was a lot of action at the meet so I will present a somewhat focused theme surrounding a scandalous event – Sprint Backstroke. I’ve waited a lifetime for the chance to get my deep thoughts on backstroke out in the open for scientific peer review.
If you’ve always wanted to enjoy some good-natured ribbing aimed at backstroke aficionados, then you should consider reading further. As a read-ahead, I will progress from a brilliant commentary about the backstroke itself to a meet-results review of our unashamed TWIM backstroke users, three of whom are so audacious that they are #1 in Virtual Nationals in the Sprint Backstroke.
Buckle up, let’s begin.
[dramatic pause]
For the record I should point out that backstroke is not real swimming.
[dramatic pause]
Whoa whoa whoa, Backstrokers – just kidding, only kidding. Relax.
Otters often hang out on their backs, it’s natural. Seriously. Nothing inherently wrong with a horizontal orientation, belly aimed skyward. Otters make it look so cute. I’ll point out that lots of stuff in nature is belly-up because, well, they’re dead. I think that’s what gives some of us reservations about the backstroke. Aside from philosophical musings, it’s a hard habit to kick once you get started, so no judgement here. It all starts with floating on your back, and before you know it you’re hooked on hardcore sprint backstroke.
The key is to never attempt floating on your back. Avoidance is usually the best policy, and for backstroke, that’s been my credo.
If you see me flailing about on my back, there’s a 90% chance I’m drowning and a 10% chance that I am experimenting with “swimming” the backstroke. Perhaps one day I’ll enter a backstroke event just so I can swim it ironically as performance art…so long as I am not required to use the fancy new-fangled foot massagers the backstrokers stand on during their starts.*
Where was I? Sorry to get long-winded, but the backstroke brings that out. Now, getting to the after-action reporting…
TWIM put forth two relay teams, with the Mixed 45+ Freestyle Relay clocking in at 2:01.40 and the Mixed 45+ Medley Relay clocking in at 2:05.08. Elliott and Wahlstrom participated in both relays. Both relay teams took 1st Place for the Blue and White. Good job relay volunteers!
USMS results indicate that Maoz swam a personal best in the 50 Backstroke, punching the timing pad in a blazing 27.60 seconds after the beep. Can water start on fire through friction? Apparently not, but I swear I saw some steam. This result places Maoz in the current season’s rankings at position Numero Uno, 1.61 seconds faster than the closest contender. Can Maoz hang on to that crown thru May 31st? We’ll be biting our nails as we wait and see.
Carl soundly trounced his recent results and swam distinctive PBs in the 50 and 100 Backstroke events. Not to be outdone by Maoz, Carl is also sitting at #1 in the 50 Backstroke for his respective age group, a huge time delta apart from the next closest contender. In case you were wondering, Carl is also Top Gun in the 100 Backstroke, and probably some other stuff as well. Discovering all this awesomeness is giving me a bit of an inferiority complex.
Holly improved on her previous 500 Freestyle time by around 15 seconds and….wait for it……swam a PB in the 50 Backstroke at 33.92. You guessed right, here we go again, #1 in the 50 Backstroke. More sprint backstroke. Not to get too deep into applied mathematics and talk over your head, but this is what statistics nerds call a “trend.”
In the graphic below it appears Holly is just 0.13 seconds ahead of the competitor in 2nd place, so get out the popcorn, sit back, and watch the 2023 battle reveal itself as we move towards the SCY end-of-season on May 31st. No pressure Holly, no pressure. I shouldn’t have even called attention to it, at least on a platform where everyone on Earth can read about it. But I’m not going to hit the backspace key either.
Thomas Walker, patron saint of TWIM, saw 550 yards of rip-roaring action in 5 events, including the 100 Backstroke. Apparently the message from the top is that backstroke is still acceptable behavior.
Kerry swam the 50 Freestyle, the 50 and 100 Breaststroke, and not to be left out of the cool-kids club, the Sprint Backstroke. It’s not too late to turn away from the backstroke, Kerry. Congrats on swimming your fastest time in the 50 free in over 8 years.
Colleen swam a clean backstroke-free roster, competing in the 50 and 100 Freestyle and the 50 Butterfly. As noted earlier, she also generously contributed to two relay teams, despite one of the teams having a backstroke sprinter involved with it.
Thomas Elliott improved significantly on his prior swims in the 50 Freestyle and the 50 Butterfly, and in fact, swam a grueling event roster – 50, 100, 200, and 500 free and both the 50 and 100 fly. Combine that with swimming in both relays, and he overwhelmingly captured the Iron-Person award at the meet, an unofficial TWIM title inspired by watching Dan Underbrink at meets. Watch out, Dan!
Remind me to quiz Thomas about his feelings on backstroke. Early intervention is key.
Brent came within a half-second of his PB in the 100 Freestyle (out of 10 swims), an indicator that he has quietly upped his game somehow. I should mention that Brent “just said no” to backstroke, although I honestly don’t know if he shares my correct but admittedly polarized viewpoint on the matter.
Kathy was another brave swimmer with a high-volume freestyle docket, swimming the 100, 200, and 500 free and she threw in for a relay to boot. Kathy swam side-by-side with Holly in the 500 free. No backstroke for Kathy either.
Joseph swam the 200 Freestyle and steered clear of any swimming wrong-side-up.
That sums up the “Sprint Backstroke Edition” of the meet blog. In closing, here’s an inspirational pre-meet message from Thomas Walker:
“In keeping with sacred tradition, I have lit the Victory Torch high atop TWIM Tower and I have started the Ceremonial Meet Clock.
Once again we are called to live out our Credo, which is to get up on the blocks at every opportunity and give it our all, for ourselves and for our teammates.
It is in this very act that we will achieve our most enduring Victory.“
Speaking for myself, the last sentence above has a very profound meaning, and I suspect it captures an aspect of what keeps many USMS swimmers leaping off the blocks. There is a certain nobility in the endless Attempt to swim your perfect race.
That’s all I got. Until next time, keep teasing the backstrokers in your life. I’ll probably have to lay low for a while.
* In the old days, when we had to swim uphill both directions in the pool (after breaking through the ice crust), we didn’t have cushy backstroke contraptions upon which to rest our feet. The blocks were milk crates and the start signal was a 12-gauge fired directly overhead. But let us not dwell in the past.
2 thoughts on “SAM Keeps the Meets a’Rollin’”
Well done!
Really good, Dave! Very entertaining!