TWIM Sails High in Snohomish

Heather O’Rourke, the precocious little blonde girl that captured the hearts and imaginations of a generation, is remembered for one, distinct iconic line. That line was from a movie of the supernatural/horror genre; a genre I never visit, mostly because there is enough horror in day to day life, but that is just my opinion.

I probably don’t even need to divulge the, well, phrase actually because it’s only two words.

But I must.

I absolutely have to because it sums up so perfectly a sentiment that not only resonates with but electrifies a cadre of athletes that has been painfully muted for nearly 2 years by a quirk of microbiological fate.

And I have to change it slightly also because the original exclamation was in the third person and so obviously would not fit here (unless it was declared by the lady across the street from the Snohomish Pool; she might’ve said “They’re baaack”).

We’re Back.

Yeah, so, Heather would’ve said it more like “Wuuuurrr baaack”. But you get the point.

And I realize that 82 people back on June 6th, nearly five months to the day earlier this year, and at the same venue no less, might want to challenge the point. But after thinking it through, I’m sure they would agree.

We are back.

Finally.

Am I being premature?

I don’t think so.

There are actually two meets in the books for western Washington coming up; the Bellevue Mile and the Anacortes meet, January and February, respectively.

And Bend, Oregon has a meet December 11th!

Couldn’t have said that back in June.

That’s right my fellow water brothers and sisters, it’s “Game ON!”

2022 is gonna be a whole different ballgame.

I am writing this article three hours after the end of today’s meet. The sights and sounds still pulsate in my brain like an incredible first date.

The smell of chlorine lingers. I don’t want to wash it off. It reminds me, along with my fatigue, of what we all missed for so long.

And the looks of the individual swimmers as they exited the pool, liquid sunshine dripping from each, said volumes.

Said the same thing.

This is what joy is.

There is an old pharmacist’s joke (my college roomie) that I can’t quite remember, mostly because it wasn’t funny to non-pharmacists, but it starts with, “How do you make a hundred people happy?”

I don’t need to know the punchline because I know the answer.

Have a swim meet.

Nothing pharmaceutical can come close.

Before I get to the “meat and potatoes” of this article, though, I need to acknowledge the Snohomish Aquatic Club, the amazing, incredible work that Robert Serviss, Dave Baer, the rest of the officials and all the staff and volunteers did to make this event possible. Without this group we would still be waiting for our first meet, post-pandemically. They were, after all, behind the scenes for the June meet, too.

Now the main course.

There were 7 TWIM members that swam back in June and that number burgeoned to twelve for this one.

Led once again by our President, Dan Underbrink, the assault was constant and relentless.

TWIM records fell while spirits soared.

When all was said and done we accumulated the most points of any team at the meet!

Here’s the roll call.

Brad Jones, butterflier extraordinaire, made it two meets in a row.

Holly and Brent, having returned from their excursion into California waters, were present, accounted for, and delivering the goods.

Stephen Fogg and David Scott, back from Nationals, were ripped and rearing to go.

Added to the mix were the indomitables, Kathy Pelham and Clark Kent, I mean Carl Haynie.

Maoz Alsberg was there, too. He brought his son along.

Yeah, I don’t buy it. I did a fist bump with the “kid” when introduced. His knuckles were calloused! You know, from doing knuckle pushups!

Don’t those martial arts guys do those all the time?

He had a steeled gaze, a quiet confidence about him, also. He looked you in the eye too, not like a run-of-the-mill kid.

Impressive.

He could’ve snapped me like a twig.

I caught him looking around several times; he was constantly assessing.

I’ve been around awhile. I’m no spring chicken; not my first rodeo. My first writing piece was from behind the slats of my crib when I was seven months old. I even kept the article and have taken it to several deciphering places but no one knows what the heck I was trying to say. My point is, I have a sixth sense about people.

I think the guy was a body guard!

What does Maoz do, again, for a living? Okay, I’ll leave it alone. Maoz was there with his “son”.

I think I better check Brent and Holly’s kids’ knuckles. They’re a little too well behaved and look too much like their “parents”. Too convincing and hence too obvious.

I gotta refocus here.

Rounding out the “destructive dozen” were new teammate, freestyler Dave Varner, the illustrious chairman of the board, Thomas Walker and yours truly, Scott Neuhaus, on the front line, reporting from the trenches.

Wow! Where to start?!

Stephen “Velvet” Fogg was working on his “off stroke” (like he has one). He swam the 50 and 100 breasts to sample base times for future workouts and hence planned future success in the IM.

“Make your worst stroke better”.

We all know what that means; become even more of a beast in the 200 and 400 IMs. Heck, he already has the 4th fastest PNA swim ever in the 200 IM for his age group (5th and 6th in the other IMs).

It’s all about goal-setting.

Three new TWIM records, by the way.

New member Dave Varner came down from Bellingham to meet, greet and join the assault. He just wanted to get his feet wet, both literally and figuratively. He swam a very nice 500 free. Like, 9th fastest in the nation, this year. That’s how “nice”.

Brad Jones defended against all comers in both fly events and tossed in a sparkling 500 free, for good measure. No new team records, ‘cuz they’re already his. No new top twelves, ‘cuz he’s already there. Where is the bottom of this guy’s talent!?

And then there was Maoz. He probably flew in from somewhere exotic to remind the Pacific Northwest that he hadn’t gone anywhere. . . permanently, that is. A new team record in the 50 free and just missed in the 100. He was grousing about a missed turn, but hey, lots of meets coming up.

David Scott flexed his prowess in the IM and breast. He also jumped into the 100 free mix to warn his age group that he was ready, willing and versatile. I asked him early on what he thought of the cold water. His reply, “That’s not cold really; it’s nearly the temperature we drink our coffee at home.”

I did not know he grew up in North Dakota!

I’m sure no one will be surprised by this but Ironman Dan swam the most events (6). Two new TWIM records in the 500 free and 100 back. I think I heard him complaining about the lack of the stroke 200s and the 400 IM but I could’ve been mistaken.

Of course I was mistaken.

I’ve never heard him complain about anything.

Holly concentrated on crushing the competition in fly and IM while her beau Brent did his usual breast events, threw in a backstroke race and then, as a portend of things to come, exited his comfort zone and blasted away at the 500 free; the result: a new team record!!

Clark, dangit, I mean Carl set team records convincingly in the 200 IM and the 100 back. Both were top three all time PNA swims, too! “Man of steel!” Ooops! Sorry. Your secret is safe with me.

Kathy flexed her talents in the 100 and 500 frees. You think she’s not going very fast ‘cuz she’s so strong in the water and then you look up at the clock and think “Did they stop it early, or something!?” This gal is just warming up.

The Chairman tussled in the 200 free event as well as both breast events, knocked off the 100 IM and then capped the whole thing off with his 5th event, the 500 Free.

Neuhaus swam both breast events and both back events. Hey! That was a new TWIM record in the 50 back.

Co-ed relays were performed adroitly, also, with the gals, due to the aforementioned short numbers, having to do double duty.

Which reminds me; hey ladies! I know a number of you have your hands full and then some. I heard through the grapevine that Colleen Wahlstrom will be returning soon, though. I hope that’s factual. We’ve missed you.

Heck we miss you all.

Erin, we miss your smile, your spirit and your amazing talents.

Jenny Salmi, where you been? Miss you, too.

The Valeries, Thompson and Powell, my Christmas list includes your return!

Jill Jordan; no time like the present to get back into it.

Tammy, I know it won’t be years but it seems like it’s been that long already.

Zena Courtney, the incredible Ms. Courtney! I hope 2022 brings you back into our fold.

Jenny Ferries, too; the IM and breast events are calling!

Jen Tighe, Kathy McDaniel and Jill Jordan! Like Uncle Sam says, “We want you!!” I’d say “Uncle Tom wants you” but, that’s too controversial.

And the original indomitable, the one that wrote the playbook for dominating an age group, Elizabeth “Betsey” Kassen. If only there was a way to have you back with us again. You were our heart and soul. Miss you tons!

I know I speak for all the guys when I say, once again, “MISS YOU ALL!”

In closing I’d like to extend a warm and supportive acknowledgement to possible soon-to-be new member, Gary Campen. He was there among our number at the meet.

This guy is a liver.

I don’t mean that in the internal organ sense but rather in the existential sense. 77 years young and, I’m tellin’ ya, not a lot of dull moments in those. He lived on his own in the wilds of Alaska for over a decade. Built his own log cabin that he lived in and just about survived off the land from. 50 years ago he even raced in the Iditarod Dog Sled race and, in fact, did it with a seventy-something year old guy that had accompanied Admiral Byrd on his second Antarctic expedition, in 1937!

Yes! That Admiral Byrd!

Saying Gary has some stories is like saying Shakespeare can write. But his scariest story with the most intrepid aspect was about a stroke he suffered 10 or so months ago. Look at the scar on his neck; it serves testament to the blockage of the carotid artery that brought it all on and nearly ended him.

He’s coming back, though; back with a different outlook and renewed vigor. Like me, he has seen behind the curtain. His experience made mine look like a tea party.

This guy is definitely TWIM material.

His message, just like mine:

Now is the time. Don’t delay.

Jump in with both feet! Stop and smell the roses.

That’s what we as TWIM members do.

We strive for that syncytial rush, that ephemeral boost of the individual working for the collective.

The TWIM Synergistic explosiveness.

“The More the Merrier”, hell, “the more the unstoppable”, the “more the inconceivable”, “the more the unimaginable”.

Bring it on world; the more of us there are, the more we are unopposed! We then battle only the clock and that is no battle at all but merely otters playing in the surf. That atavistic expenditure of energy that is all for the pure joy of it.

Pure joy in liquid sunshine.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Blue Wave, Schmoo Wave. We got our own wave that is swelling off shore and gathering energy. Each meet we add more to our ranks. And when we’re all in line and that TWIM wave hits the shore it will be like a tsunami!

And it will be something to behold!

Jump in, the water’s great!!